No Good Deed...

(Originally posted on the night of Game 3)

I hate cats.

This is an important thing to mention before I get into my very odd night.

Perhaps hate is a strong word. I certainly don't really like them. Cats are not my cup of tea. They're often very cold. I had a bad experience for years with my Uncle Ricky's cat who would scare the crap out of me whenever I tried to go upstairs to the washroom. I thought he was going to bite my neck, the cat was just evil. I also lived for several months with a couple of cats that belonged to my roomate. She didn't look after them much, so we had two cats crawling around the house doing their business wherever and whenever they felt. Guess who the clean up fell to?

I'm a dog man, and I will never apologize for that. You can keep your cats.

Anyhow, tonight was Game 3 of the NHL's Western Conference Finals. My team, the wonderful Edmonton Oilers were looking to go ahead 3-0 in the series. Unfortunately, I had to cover a town council meeting in Wasaga Beach at 7 o'clock. It's about 80 minutes outside of Owen Sound. Usually this council goes about an hour and a half, so I was hoping I'd be able to catch the third period of the game. Those hopes did not come true.

Tonight they were holding a public meeting on two high rise buildings someone wants to build in town. This of course outraged many people. 7 and 8 story buildings will certainly destroy the entire town. As a result, the meeting went on for 3 and a half hours - well into the game that started at 8 o'clock. When I realized I was going to be stuck in there I called around to see if anyone watching it could offer me text updates. Here I will thank the great Léa Godbout who came through huge for me tonight. Text updates throughout the meeting were about 10 times more exciting than the content of the meeting itself. As I was leaving it was 4-0 Oilers in the third period, and despite being upset I missed the game, I was clearly thrilled.

Then quickly the score went from 4-0 to 4-2, and just as quickly my cell phone died. As luck would have it, the game was on AM 640 Radio from Toronto. Depending on where I am on the road, I can pick up that station well enough. Soon it was 4-3 - and I realized what was happening. I wasn't wearing my lucky Retro home jersey! I had brought it with me in case I got a chance to go to a bar and catch the end of the game or something - so I threw it on. Within seconds the Oilers scored off of the faceoff. It was magic. Of course the Ducks made it 5-4 and nearly gave me a heart attack, but the boys held on. What a strange finish, and what a game to miss.

Just as I was catching my breath driving down the Highway on the way back home... I drive past what looks like road kill (making sure not to hit it) and suddenly see a head jump up. It took me a few seconds to realize that whatever was in the middle of the road was alive and wasn't moving. It took me about a minute to stop the car and decide to turn around. Upon returning to the site I realized I wasn't just dreaming. There was a small white cat in the middle of the highway, and despite my big station car having driven right past it... the bloody thing hadn't moved.

There was also a huge truck coming down the other side of the road towards that little cat. I was stricken with panic - jumped out of the car and ran towards the animal. I waved my hands at the truck directing it to move away, because for whatever reason this cat wasn't moving. At the last second it saw me, moved to the side and managed to avoid hitting the little thing.

I walked up to it and didn't see any sign of injury. The cat wasn't bleeding, nor was it making any noise displaying pain. Still, despite my pokes and suggestions, the little bugger wasn't moving. There was now another car coming, so I picked it up and tried to carry it towards my car. It didn't like that. The cat started squirming and biting at me, but the car was on its way and I couldn't just drop it, so I chucked it onto the shoulder. Hey - cats land on their feet right.

Well whatever was wrong with the cat, at least now it wasn't stuck in the middle of the road. Now what? It's 11:45pm, I can't just go from farm to farm here in the middle of no where asking each place if it's theirs. Plus, my cell phone, as we all ready established, is dead. Oh well, over to the car to consider my next... FUCK!

Guess what I did?

Since I was in such a panic to save the cat from certain death, I left the keys in the ignition and the station vehicle just HAPPENS to have automatic locks.

It's nearly midnight, at least a 5 minute drive from the closest town, my cell phone is dead, I'm locked out of the car, and the little cat still won't move.

Upon closer inspection it seems like the cat is actually a kitten. Not only that, but freaked out of its mind. It must have wandered out into the middle of the road, nearly got hit, and gone into shock. Anytime I come near the thing it backs off or hisses. I think cats know I don't like them. They seem to have a sense for things like that.

A few cars go by and ignore my waving. Usually people here are friendlier.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, one car stops. The woman was very helpful and happens to have a cell phone. Except, who do I call? I tried 411 to see if there was any tow truck place in Meaford, but the after hours number didn't work. Before we had to take the next step, a couple of OPP cars pulled up.

When explaining the situation to the officers, I started to look around and the kitty was gone. Now I look like a nut. Neither the woman in the car or the cops saw the thing, and the look on their faces makes me think they are curious if there even was a cat. That is until one of the officers (both women btw) spot the poor thing huddled on top of my back wheel. So now even if I could drive the kitty is blocking my exit.

The officers radioed back to their dispatch, and were able to get them to send me a tow truck. In the mean time, we went to work trying to calm the kitty down. The female officer definately did a better job that I could've. Finally, after about 10 minutes it went into her arms and out of my wheel. Then she took it across the street to the farm before I could ask what she was doing. The officer returned and said the cat jumped out of her arms and took off towards the barn. So wait, I go out of my way to make sure this little kitty is ok, and she just let it go on some random farm? Do we KNOW that's where it came from? Do we know it won't just come back out towards the road?

Well that officer leaves, and the other one and I are just standing there waiting for the tow truck...

Officer: "So, you must love cats."

Me: "Actually I can't stand them."

Officer: "...Oh..."

*Moment of Silence*

Officer: "You can't stand them?"

Me: "Yeah."

Officer: "So why'd you stop."

Me: "Well, someone must love this one, god knows why..."

Officer: "Huh..."

And the tow truck arrives. He opens my door, and thank god he accepted VISA because I had no cash. Of course my VISA is my dad's VISA, so yeah Dad, I owe you some cash. How much? 50 bucks. Hmm, I left for the meeting at around 6... I make 10 dollars an hour.. looks like this whole trip is going to be net me a tidy profit of 5 dollars.

He left and in a moment of concern I walked up to the farmer's field to see if the kitty was still there. A quick scan produced nothing. But I've gone this far, I saw a light on in the window and wanted to make sure this was the right place. Walked up to the old rickity farm house and knocked... nothing. Wait for a bit, knock again... nothing. It's windy, eerily quiet and the wind blows open a shutter with a loudy smack.

At that point I decided I've seen enough cheezy movies to know it was time to leave.

I don't know what's become of my little buddy. I hope he made it home. What I do know is that this better be darn good karma for my Edmonton Oilers.

Oh, and no good deed goes unpunished.